Soylent Green is People... People!!!

Scott and I don't disagree much. There are a few things like, our boys hair, rain boots, spring water vs. drinking, and of course, Hall and Oats -that we will not back down on, but whatever. Those are trivial things that we, for the most part, laugh about. Our yard, on the other hand, has almost brought us to donkey kicks and "you-know-what slaps".

Because of the lovely spring weather, we are back to the old yard work grind, and there's been a little tension.

Our home was built last year and apparently the sod was put down during the worst drought Tennessee has had in like a million years or something. Anyway, the grass stunk. The back yard was even worse because it was seeded, so by the time we moved in, there was nothing but thistles and weeds.

Like the good Mormon family that we are, we banded together and started what the kids affectionately called, "The War on the Weeds". Pulling, seeding, etc... we did it. Scott over seeded with a 3 fescue blend and I was given the task of putting the straw down to keep the seeds from getting eaten or baked by the sun.

Well, you know me, I don't do anything halfway! I spent two days putting straw down til every square inch of our yard was covered. The neighbors were so complimentary and yes, I felt like a winner! Our grass started coming up immediately... but there was a problem. It was much lighter in color than the original grass.

We figured it was just new grass and by mid spring it would darken up. Well, it's mid spring and it's not only much lighter than the other grass, it grows three times as quickly.

So over the past few weeks, I've started to get really frustrated (that's the nice way of saying P.O'd) because of course, I thought it was the seed Scott put down. "Why did you do a blend and not tall fescue only?!" etc, etc... In response to my hysteria, he came up with a plan. Our family was to pick every last blade of reject grass til it was gone. CRAZY TALK. My neighbors even volunteered to help! I absolutely refused, and again, grew more "frustrated".

Well, to make a long, incredibly boring story short, it turns out, after a whole lot of drama, it wasn't the seed after all. It was the straw. The two days of hard labor, my overzealous throwing of the straw apparently did more than we thought. I seeded the entire yard with wheat seed. Luckily, if we keep it mowed, it will die out and we don't have to harvest it.

So, this is my attempt at a very long, overdue and dull apology to my husband. Sorry for being so"frustrated".

ROSES ARE RED,

VIOLETS ARE BLUE,

I PLANTED WHEAT ,

SO, I'LL FINISH THE MULCHING FOR YOU.

It's nice to know after years of marriage, we can keep it real.